cancer

Survivor Dedication

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Mr. Kailash Chandra was a patient of Pharyngeal carcinoma with widespread metastasis.

His last conversation with his daughter on 28.4.05

“You are leaving?”

“Yes daddy. I have to join office”

“… Am I dying?” His eyes beseeched her to be honest with him.

She tried to control the tears that were threatening to spill over and bravely continued.

“Well! They have already made a channel for food. That should take care of your nutrition and after you regain some of your strength then we can think of surgery… and also we have attempted alternate medicine…..Rest , who can say anything about tomorrow…but we will fight it out  till the last. Won’t we?”

He nodded. “I was just thinking of the pain…”

“No no! I won’t let you suffer, I promise. I will put you to sleep myself if the need arises… trust me…But you have to be brave. You will be. Won’t you?”

He nodded a faint smile on his lips. (Probably to make her happy). Then turning towards his wife he said casually. “Hope you have prepared chicken for lunch. Biti (his daughter) likes it.”

Mr. Kailash Chandra passed away on 18/05/05…  He did not suffer much.

Today’s survivor story is dedicated to all those who gave a brave fight but could not make it as a survivor… but for me,  they were survivors in their own right for facing their crisis head on and putting a brave fight till the end.

Multiple Myeloma

Last hours of the first day of the new year. I received a call from my elder brother from my native. He asked me to talk to my uncle and call him back. I rang my uncle  who is a doctor . He shared a news with me that shattered me. My dad is been diagonised with multiple myeloma , a form incurable  blood cancer.

I was emotionless for a moment. I was reactionless for a moment. I kept down the phone. My wife asked me what happened. I was still and then burst into tears. My life is changed. I cried. cried. cried again. My wife tried to console me . I never heard of the term multiple myeloma before. I researched on the net. The more I read , the more tears gathered in me.

The hard facts I learnt of the disease sunk me deep in despair , grief and pain. The news is not yet passed on to my parents. My brother , uncle and aunt will share it today noon. I desperately hope my Parents have the strength to absorb the news.

Morning I cried. Even now. Tears are in my eyes. Sometimes its good to write down the pain and that is what am doing now. Trying desparately to calm my nerves and thoughts . Morning my mom said If you could get leave , come and visit dad . My brother also said since morning dad was saying he wants to see me and my wife. I have booked the ticked and leaving to native in a while.

When I was talking to my brother on phone I cried and I could hear him also vent out the surpressed tears. I don’t know how I could hold my pain and tears when I see my Parents tomorrow. I don’t want to cry before them which would make them inconsolable and shatter them even further .

I desperately want strength to pass on strength to my parents .