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The Big Loser

The Big Loser

There was one thing everyone noticed about her- it was not her deep black eyes or black hair or her creativity or even her dimpled smile, it was her weight. She stood 120 kgs tall and that was the only criteria by how she was always measured.  She was not ugly, she was quite charming, shy and intelligent despite the way she looked. For as long as she remembered, her weight however was the only thing that mattered to the world.

She worked as a secretary in a financial organization and loved her job. She had many friends with whom she spent time, in and out the job, but surprisingly it was only Guys. Girls had always been mean to her, always a bitch. Guys, on the other hand, looked past the way she looked and admired her ability to carry herself well.

But they were just friends. She did not remember the last time she went out on a date, had been in a relationship, had felt Love.

She wanted to lose weight, lose it badly. The doctors, dieticians, trainers all told her the same thing, ‘You are young! You can lose weight easily.’ It was not easy. It was a daily struggle which only she knew of. She just could not stop eating junk food- burgers, fries, coke, chips- her weakness.  And she was a constant matter of ridicule, her diet always under scrutiny, always mocked and tested.

Her last birthday, she was not even allowed to cut a cake. She had to be satisfied eating a salad and dry pasta, with a diet coke as her b’day dinner. She had hated them all so much that day. It did not matter that they complimented her carefully selected navy dress or her straightened hair. She had, had it with the weight. She was determined to lose the extra kilos- she knew she was not going to be the next Miss World or a hot model, but she wanted to be looked at- in a normal way, without focus shifting to her bulging stomach and hips.

She Googled for a diet program suitable to her needs. She found one in no time. A diet comprising of whole wheat bread, fresh fruits and vegetables, and a weekly intake of any sweets/chocolates she liked. She was a late sleeper but woke up at 6 am every day, rain or shine, and went fo a walk. The walk slowly went on to become a jog and eight months later, she was a regular at her colony’s jogging park, brisk walking and running with her terrain Fluffy and an i-pod to give her company.

Everybody started noticing her now, who wouldn’t- she became from a huge 120 kgs to a lanky 70 kgs. She stood 5.10” and for once in life she looked sexy with her curves and height and not intimidating.

She was still the same person- she still had the same friends, she still remained intelligent and witty; but the ones around her had changed. She saw her guy friends look at her differently; look at her like they looked at other girls. The girls in her office actually started talking to her, and inviting her to hang out with them.

One of her friends and colleagues, a good looking guy, actually asked her out on a date. A date- something which she hadn’t been in over three years! The kids in her colony, who would stare and mock at her, now looked at her with ogling eyes. Even her parents, who loved her, of course, took more pride in her now. Yes, her life had changed, she hadn’t- but the world around her certainly had.

A year later, she no longer worked at the financial institution. She had become a model, not the thin Carol Gracias type one, but a model who embraced her full body. She was married to her colleague, the good looking guy who had asked her out. She now had a lot of friends, both guys and girls. She had become the person she had always wanted to be- popular, beautiful, curvy and rich!

But she still was not happy- her husband, her former best friend hated the person he had married. He said, ‘You no longer have the beauty which you had when you were overweight.’ Maybe he was just jealous of the attention she recieved, of the fame and money she had, of the guys who hit on her every day.  She, however, knew what it was- she was a ‘Big loser.’

She had lost a lot of weight. And, she had also lost a lot of herself.

0 28 November, 2011 Other Stories November 28, 2011

About the author

Vinita Radhakrishna is a poetess, an occasional blogger, an aspiring novelist, a full-time writer and partner with Soulpen (www.soulpen.in) and most importantly, an avid dreamer! For more info, you can reach her at vinita@soulpen.in Till then, keep writing!

View all articles by Vinita Radhakrishna

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