My Dearest Khalifa…
You lay by the frosted glass, knowing not who you are. I wonder if you hear my voice everyday. My heart feel a thousand needles when I see you fingers shake. If only you saw my love.
They say you may never wake up. They say that miracles are not in their hands. They guard you day and night and yet you are alone. If my life I could forgo, I would gladly do it for you. Fate has been so cruel to us; it robbed you of a mother and me of a son. If only you saw my love.
It is impossible to forget you. You maybe just a number, yet you are a significant one. Five times a day, I pray to Allah to have mercy on you. I ask him to show you my love.
Two months since the world greeted you, two months since you lay like a doll, two months since I held you, my baby … kicking in my womb.
When languages and prayers of all kinds float around you, do you realize that they speak of love and sadness? If you tiny brain woke up, would you smile when you see me? Would you smile at the ladies who took care of you all day? Can you wake up today and look at me with light in your tiny eyes? Khalifa, can you wake up to my love and prove everyone wrong?
It maybe madness, to not accept you as you are. Hope is all I have when I sit by you my baby.They ask me to say “Good Bye”….how can I when you touched me so deep? How can I say No to a life that lived as a part of me for nine months? How can I when my eyes behold you forever as my dearest Khalifa?
I would like to dedicate this to the little fellow who I see everyday at my hospital. His name is Khalifa and he stole my heart from day One. He suffered from complications at birth and is on the life support. He will never recover to be a normal boy nor will his tiny brain be alive. Yet, when I see his mother, the mother in me cries… every night. She was to have a normal baby by all counts, yet she is fated to be by the bedside of a baby she cannot hold nor ever see a smile from.
I love you my little Khalifa.