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The “N” Word

Also known as “Locker room phobia“.

I used to be a swimmer. That was 10 years ago. I also used to be a recreational runner. Until last week, that is, when I was terribly stricken by the “Iliotibial Band Syndrome“. I don’t care much for medical jargon but a $200 visit to the doctor confirmed that I should probably keep off my stricken knee for a while. I didn’t like the idea so much as I like to run. It’s my release. Now this doctor (a rather attractive one, if I may add! Hubba Hubba!), a*real* doctor unlike me, had asked me to skimp on my running. Sucks to be me right?

Well now how do I remedy my situation? Where am I going to burn the extra calories away? The swimming pool!!!! I *used to* swim, once upon a time!!! What’s stopping me from doing that again? So after I procured an appropriate pair of swimming trunks (Speedos are a no-no!) and goggles to keep the chlorine out of my eyes, I went ahead and got myself to our university pool locker room at 6am on Wednesday, a good 2-3 hours before the sun even dared to peek out of the night.

I had geared myself up for it. And then it happened. Moral quandary time, if you will.  ”OMG!!! I AM NEKKID!” The university requires that “By law, all patrons are required to have a hot, nude shower before entering the pool area”. I am not necessarily in bad shape to feel to feel overly conscious about myself but this was inexplicable and ridiculous at the same time.

The only thing I can think of now is that society has completely f-ed with our minds if we cannot be comfortable naked. I don’t think anyone of us came into this world all dressed up. I don’t think it has to do with a conservative attitude neither has it to do with the size of one’s junk (oh grow up, will you!). And then I found that this was an issue experienced by several people irrespective of which side of the Atlantic (or pacific or the Arabian sea if you are so inclined) they are from (except the European chaps who are quite open — makes you want to move to Europe).

What I am glad about is that I took the big step into nudity (pictures soon — just kidding — or am I?!) and took that big leap into the great unknown. I got a rejuvenating swim out of it and have vowed to be back there this Sunday!

What do you guys/gals think? Would you be comfortable nude in front of complete stranger of the same sex?

Expect a follow up article on this very topic in the near future (which on my time scale could be anywhere between 1 week to 5 years!)

0 18 November, 2010 Other Stories November 18, 2010

About the author

The name may sound funny and weird and it spills over his character too. He prefers to keep his identity secret and we respect his choice. Thanks to a moment of “what an idea, sirji” we have him on-board our panel and don’t ask me more about the idea, it is our kitchen secret but his writings are here to enthrall you.

View all articles by Sir Pumpkin Longshanks

14 comments

    1. Sir Pumpkin Longshanks

      In that case you may have been removed from the locker room area as you would be breaking a few federal laws!!!! I know, right?

      Reply
    1. Sir Pumpkin Longshanks

      Yea, neither would I mind it being the opposite sex; and I am not kidding! I am a nasty lecherous Halloween related vegetable.

      Reply
  1. Anney

    SPL…and naked….is there a law that says that pumpkins can’t go naked? Just kidding…loved the undertones in your views.

    Reply

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