Passage

She lived a life which was luxurious compared to normal standards. She wanted to have everything in life. No morals posed a barrier for her. She was very influential… her very pious husband, cunning daughters, useless sons, all fell in line when she wanted them to… except her eldest son. She had a faint idea why but she was not one to be outdone. She schemed and tortured her eldest daughter-in-law, and even reported untruthful accusations to the poor girl’s mother. Even then, the eldest son never spoke a word against his mother. But finally one day she had her husband and others kick the eldest son out of the house, along with his young wife and kids. He warned her that her ways would bring her only more suffering but being heart-broken, he left with his family without further conversation.

Time passed by. Her husband departed his body, blissfully unaware of his wife’s wrongdoings. Her eldest daughter-in-law asked that she better come and stay in her eldest son’s home. But she refused, ridiculed the eldest’s family and put her faith on the money and sycophants who were behind her.

Years rolled by. Money played and changed hands. Betrayals built upon each other. Slowly, one by one who had been supporting her left from her side along with what they could take.

Finally, there came a day where she was left with nothing more than a small bank balance and an emaciated body. She was like a coconut shell, grated and thrown out on the street. No home, no sons or daughters to take care of her festering, foul smelling body. She lamented about the good old days, but that did nothing to change her heart and attitude. She landed up in a relative’s house, who took her in partly out of sympathy and partly for the money she said she would pay them. When the soft hearted girl in that home or the hired nurse came to clean her foul body, she would yell and curse at them. If asked what she wanted to eat, she would complain that the food was fit only for dogs.

Only her eldest son kept coming and visiting her, his broken heart still bearing a burden of duty, at the relative’s place. Yet, she spewed acid at him. He bore it with a grim face and set about his duties just for the sake of it. On one of his visits, she screamed and sobbed.

“Why? Why am I made to suffer like this? What sin did I commit?”

The son, shocked at the outburst, recovered and retorted.

“What sins have you not done, mother? You think I did not know what you were up to in your able days?”

It was her turn to be shocked. The son sighed and stared at the wall.

“Oh yes, mother… I knew of your doings. Even father was unaware of it. But I kept silent because I did not wish to shame our family. You were only after pleasure and money. You wanted people to be at your beck and call. You thought you can buy love with money, buy affection through gifts.

“But when you got an idea that I might know what you were up to, you felt fear for the first time… fear that your status and righteous image might come crashing down, fear that what you call as ‘mine’, won’t be with you anymore. You couldn’t confront me directly, so you chose to target my wife. Oh, how I wish I could have spoken up against you that time? I saw the poor girl being put through hell by you, but did not do anything. I have repented for that mistake a thousand times over. If had been any other girl would have divorced me, then and there.

“You hungers didn’t get satisfied even with my exit from our home. Who all were your sidekicks and how many were your indulgences? So much money you made by selling father’s lands. And much did you give to my sisters and brothers. But, where are they now? My father, a pious man, left you in good condition, but what have you done? You have sucked everything dry by your indulgences and indiscreetness. You feared that someone would steal everything from you, yet you were handing out everything to the very thieves you feared!”

She started sobbing.

“It is only the good deeds of father that have kept you going till now. You have grown old. But even at this age, when your body is rotting and the cold call of death is nearby, you do nothing but think of money and luxury. You curse those who help you. You curse my family, but I don’t fear your curses, for I know my Lord will save me. But what awaits you in the afterlife? I wouldn’t wish what you have been or about to go through even for my enemies!

“I have spoken to your doctors. There is nothing they can do now. At least now, throw aside your pretence and sincerely pray for forgiveness and mercy if you can. Let the Lord have mercy on you and ease your passing. I have been doing what I can as a matter of duty… and I have one last duty left.”

She sobbed more. She cursed more. But her voice had started becoming lower and trembling. The son smiled sadly, switched on a tape recorder which filled the room with a soul livening kirtana. He went out of the room, sighed at his relatives and went away. Within 10 minutes he was on the train home, but his thoughts went back to her. And he prayed.

“Oh Krishna, no one knows how you make this world work. I know that my mother is suffering for her sins. No matter how much medical attention is given, I have seen that there is no improvement. Have pity on the poor soul. Did you not say that what one remembers at the time of death, they will attain surely in the next birth? Your names are not different from you. So, at least for the sake of this poor fallen devotee of yours, grant her passage out of this misery in your presence.”

Suddenly, his mobile phone rang and he answered. A strange, sad calmness engulfed him. He got down at the next stop and caught the train going in the opposite direction.

Written by Ambi

Ambi

A techie by profession but spiritual by nature. Ambi writes about the ancient wisdom of our Indian culture in a way the modern generation can easily understand. Oh ya, his comments are as interesting as his posts and his posts always trigger healthy debates.

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This entry was posted on January 12, 2010 at 7:00 am and is filed under Other Stories. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.