When Sandeep Unnikrishnan, 26/11 martyr, expressed his intention to join army, his father tried to talk him out but in vain.Eventually he joined army and died as a hero. As I read about this in an article my mind recollected a Khalil Gibran poem I read recently.
Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life’s longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.
You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow,
which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them,
but seek not to make them like you.
How true! Generations of parents are puzzled by this fact, angered by this fact, confused by this fact and many would have forcefully tried to mould their children. Very few would have willingly allowed their children to fly like birds to chase their own dreams and weave their own dream. May be this inability to comprehend the individuality is what we term as “generation gap”. ‘
The uniqueness of the human race is to dream, think and act individually. We dream differently, think differently and act differently. The seed of this uniqueness is inbuilt in individual soul and the failure to accept that results in friction of relation. It not only applies to parents-children but also to every relations in general.
Lets learn to accept the difference, acknowledge the difference and respect the difference as an individual, as a community, as a nation. World would be a better place if we really learn this life’s little secret. Anybody listening?
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Wonderful
.. even in Evolution, man evolved from apes because some group of apes were ‘different’ and they led to different branch in tree of evolution which ‘grew’ to be a separate species itself – Homo Sapien.
Dare to be different.
@Sambi
Errr… sorry to hijack the thread… but need to correct this one. The ‘Theory’ of evolution does not state man evolved from apes. It merely postulates that both might have descended from a common ancestor… aka from a single celled jiggly wiggly.
… not that I believe it to be true… but anyway.
/cast flameguard
@LR:
“Anybody listening?”
In an ideal world, yes.
In the real world, nope. People got their stuff to do… and don’t care about what pleases the other in a relationship.
Fact. Unfortunately.
Yeah u are correct I was mixing science with fiction, refraining from taking actual scientific names.
But the procedure is correct. It’s only because one generation was different from its previous one, that we cud evolve.
Hey I think for a parent that is a very tough thing to do so. Maybe years of being conditioned by the society and traditional family values. When you become one maybe you will see it through a parent’s perspective too
A wonderful thought provoking post.
So true yet so difficult to adopt in real life.
Thank you for sharing the wonderful poem.
Keep up the wonderful work.
Cheers!!
This is my fav. poem of Zibran…and I totally agree to this..wemust encourageb and support our children to fulfill their dreams..give themwings of freedom and roots of support.
Agreed with the Soul of the topic.Parents should evolve a bit to respect and encourage individual thinking of their children however at the same time children should have enough self-discipline and understanding to chose what is right than what is easy and even if they disagree with parents on some issues they should show respect in disagreement. What I observed over the years is that the generation gap is increasing between parents and children gradually.Children are becoming more independent-minded and in the process they may go for right or wrong and that is exactly the time when passive persuasion/advice/guidance can help them but imposing something won’t which parents should understand too . For example, I tend to fill that generation gap between my parents and younger brother(9th std) on some contagious issues. :d
recently i had interaction with some learned professors’ from the University of Westminster, they were in Shobhit University Meerut under stdent exchange programs. They were interviewing students and asked why do they want to study in UK? Most of the students reply was that they want to fulfill their father’s dream, parent’s wish! They yelled -Where the hell are your own dreams? If you follow your dream your parent’s dream will naturally fulfill!
perhaps parental dream is a facade we use to show our inability. Afterall Maj Sandeep Unnikrishnan did not listen to his father but ultimately did him proud.
“It not only applies to parents-children but also to every relations in general.” was thinking exactly the same while reading absolutely right we fail to recognize the individuality …
I agree to most of the things you said here …if got time please read this post written by one of my blogger friend ZB…he is Maj.Unnikrishnan’s cousin..the link is http://zillionbig.blogspot.com/2009/11/my-hero.html.Thanks.
Well said, Lakshmi! I wish more people were made aware of this – it would change every child’s life and give them hope!
@ Sambi
lol..
@Johnny
May God bless you with children soon :p
@Mani
I agree… when we wear the shoes of a parent the thought process may change on the same issue…
@Chatterbox
thanks ! Keep visiting!
@Antarman
Right not just children , as i said in the post it applies to all relations too..
@Vishal
That was a wonderful comment!
@Sharat
“If you follow your dream your parent’s dream will naturally fulfill” hmmm true … provided we dream positvely!
@Dhiman
@Kavita
Tx for the link! Your url was not working but i was able to visit the blog url.
@Anita
Nice to see your comment! Looking forward to more views from you on GingerChai
great poem !!!
just visit my blog i have something about 26/11
http://www.gr8bluffmaster.blogspot.com
i remember reading those khalil gibran lines when i was a student. one of my favs
there is something on similar notes in the bible also.
i agree totally with Zibran….though i am not a parent….i still feel passionately about this….i truly believe each one of us should encourage every child to dream and to dare to make it come true….let wind beneath their wings…just like my parents did…i am what i wanted to be…because they had that faith in me….and made me believe that i had it in me….so DARE…..DREAM….BELIEVE….and YOU CAN…!!!